Any life coach will tell you that good self esteem is pivotal in order to achieve an overall better mental health. It is the key stepping stone in order to feel happier and more content in ones life. It is for this reason that obtaining a higher level of self esteem is so vital, however this journey is not one that does not take time and effort.
Nevertheless, I have compiled 10 simplified steps in order to help you achieve a better sense of self esteem in your day to day life.
- Be proud of how far you have already come ! Look back on your journey and note all the little or big things you have achieved or overcome. This could be as meaningful as getting that job you worked so hard for, or even as simple as cooking yourself a nice meal after a long day. Keep this list and continue to add to it, checking it whenever you are feeling low about yourself. It can be used as a reminder of how great you truly are. Do not only focus on your failures but be sure to always honour your countless successes, big or small.
2. You come first. Your are your own main character in the story of your life. Society has instructed us from a young age that we should always put others’ needs before our own, to always share and to never be selfish. However true this may be, there is a difference between being selfish and putting your needs first. Making yourself a priority gives one a heightened self esteem for by giving importance to your own needs and desires, you are giving your self a greater sense of importance as well.
3. Find yourself and get to know who you really are. What drives you ? What scares you? Or what is something that you enjoy more than anything ? It might be daunting to begin to get to know oneself but it is so important in the journey of building a greater sense of self esteem.
4. Do not try and please everyone. It is an impossible task and you are almost certainly setting yourself up for failure. Not only will you very rarely manage to please everyone in your life at the same time, but you are also failing to put yourself first by doing so. You must stop giving too much importance to the world around you and instead focus on yourself. Be your own self, no matter what someone else may want you to be. That is a key step to achieving a higher self esteem .
5. Positive reinforcement is also so important. The language we use in our day to day life has been proven to massively impact our moods and especially our self worth. Negative language, where you demean and devalue yourself will almost certainly lead to a low sense of self esteem.
Therefore, by using positively reinforced language we are able to heighten our self worth and ensure that we are more confident.
6. Do not focus on your failures and mistakes. We are all humans and we will all at one point in our lives experience such. Instead of being too critical when you do fail, instead try view these failures as lessons and begin to refer to them as such. Change your way of thinking to boost your self esteem.
7. Gratitude. Being grateful is so important when trying to build a greater sense of self esteem. You need to stop comparing yourself to others, good or bad and focus on your self. Do not negate your own feelings and situation by concentrating on what someone else may or may not have. Instead focus on what you have. Focus on what you can be grateful for.
8. Surround yourself with positivity and that also means surrounding yourself with likeminded positive people. Negative people, whether they mean to or not, can massively bring down how you feel about yourself. Instead, surround yourself with those who make you feel good about yourself and raise you up.
9. “No” is a powerful word. It helps you build boundaries which will, in turn, help you remain protected and respected. Learning to say “no” to people is fundamental to feeling better about your self esteem.
10. Love yourself. It has been said over and over again but its importance is paramount. When you love yourself, you attract love and thus live a happier and healthier life. Loving yourself comes in different forms, whether you try to exercise daily ,eating a more healthy diet or even just looking after your mental health. Taking care of yourself is so important when building a greater sense of self esteem.
These 10 steps do simply the issue of self esteem, however, by trying to practise them everyday, little by little you will find that they will in fact become easier and more apparent in your life as your self esteem developed and grows.
