Why are we “people pleasers”?
Not knowing your own worth and self-esteem as a result of events and people in your journey of life from early on have “affected” your center of identity. Their negative statements or demands may have regularly put you in the “not good enough” zone. As a result, you developed a sense of feeling conditioned by limiting beliefs that may not have even reflected the truth but are carried on throughout your life. These weigh you down with habits that don’t serve your highest good and hinder your progress.
Your voice may not have been heard far too many times. You’ve learnt to bottle up your frustrations and do everything possible to tick someone else’s boxes in the hope that you will get the validation and acceptance that you so deeply crave.
You may have lost yourself and your essence. You may have become increasingly frustrated, angry and grown accustomed to bending over backwards in order to please all those around you.
You are in “people pleasing mode”.
Going back as early as your childhood and realising where those negative beliefs started, dealing with them with clarity and detaching from them, allows you to move forward with a new healthy approach of living life true to yourself. This means establishing healthy boundaries and respecting yourself without “people pleasing”.
If the piece of the puzzle doesn’t fit, don’t try to force it in.
You are not there to please the world. Even if you tried, it would never happen and it would only make you feel unhappier, unfulfilled and always feeling low.
To avoid “people pleasing”, you need to choose wisely with whom you surround yourself. Those individuals that accept and respect you do not attempt to put you down with their own inadequacies, fears and negativity.
Accepting a life that is conditioned by others’ wishes, opinions and what they think is right for you, is a life of people pleasing that creates an unhealthy, damaging and unfulfilling journey.
Learn to change the thoughts and the perspective, and regain your freedom. Stop the damage that you accept out of your own free will.
Nobody forces you to believe you are not good enough. You chose to believe those beliefs of others and their constant demands of conditioning you that you were not enough.
If you chose to allow this, you are the only one that can stop this cycle and allow it no more. The shift in the brain occurs and you replace the negativity with the positive thoughts that you learn to say to yourself. This is known as positive self talk. It is the “Jimminy Cricket” voice that we all have, but we tend to ignore and believe all those around us that we falsely assume know better.
Your inner voice has to learn to be kind to yourself and support you – you deserve this and you are worthy!
